Yes, on a day dedicated to teaching justice, equality, togetherness and unity, the future governor of Alabama took it upon himself to say that although he doesn’t see color, he just can’t be friends with someone who’s different than him.

I was elected as a Republican candidate. But once I became governor … I became the governor of all the people. I intend to live up to that. I am color blind,” Bentley said in a short speech given about an hour after he took the oath of office as governor.

Then Bentley, who for years has been a deacon at First Baptist Church in Tuscaloosa, gave what sounded like an altar call.

“There may be some people here today who do not have living within them the Holy Spirit,” Bentley said. ”But if you have been adopted in God’s family like I have, and like you have if you’re a Christian and if you’re saved, and the Holy Spirit lives within you just like the Holy Spirit lives within me, then you know what that makes? It makes you and me brothers. And it makes you and me brother and sister.”

Bentley added, ”Now I will have to say that, if we don’t have the same daddy, we’re not brothers and sisters. So anybody here today who has not accepted Jesus Christ as their savior, I’m telling you, you’re not my brother and you’re not my sister, and I want to be your brother.”

Got that? You can be his brother or sister – you just have to give up something fundamental in your own life, change your religion, and become Christian. It’s the kind of message you’d expect someplace like Afghanistan or Iran – the kind of thing that gets a pass in fundamentalist Muslim countries – but increasingly it’s also what you get right here at home from the Republican Party.

The same people who grumble about the Muslim world and bash their intolerance – the same people who decry their way of life and criticize (often rightly) that part of the world for fostering oppressive societies – are doing the same thing at home. Juxtapose this speech with Barack Obama’s speech last week in Tucson. One was about overcoming differences and working together. It was about working together toward a better tomorrow, bridging differences of all kinds along the way. It was about treating opponents with respect and recognizing that, despite our differences, we all are brothers and sisters.

The other was an overt refutation of that message. Be like me or pack your bags. Alabama: more and more like Iran every day.

[Political Wire]

The bottom line is, in the war against getting anything done in Congress Jim DeMint is a leader. A Supreme honcho. The teabagger favorite and all-around piece of human garbage has decided that Congress is engaged in the (fake) war on Christmas. He says the push to get the massive spending bill through the Senate in the days before Dec. 25 is — and we’re not kidding — sacrilegious. Just read for yourself!

You can’t jam a major arms control treaty right before Christmas,” he told POLITICO. “What’s going on here is just wrong. This is the most sacred holiday for Christians. They did the same thing last year – they kept everybody here until (Christmas Eve) to force something down everybody’s throat. I think Americans are sick of this.”

He’s right about one thing: Americans are sick. They’re sick of obstructionists blocking shit for the sake of blocking it. They’re sick of the two parties not being able to compromise about anything. And — we can only speak for ourselves in this case — they’re sick of fucking assholes like Jim DeMint using religion as an opportunity to be a cock. Does this fucking asshole know how many Christians work on Christmas? What a fuckface.

Pardon. That was a little much, even for us (though we did publish an anti-Elizabeth Edwards obit last week, so maybe this a step backward in the bile department).

DeMint conveniently glosses over the fact that a lame duck Congress does this shit all the time. That is, pushes a massive amount of legislation forward in an effort to get laws passed, and — just as importantly — fund the government before the session ends.

The kicker is that this bozo’s solution is to slow the process down so that everyone has to work longer. Yeah, that’ll show ‘em!

“DeMint has demanded a full reading of the treaty, a process that, ironically, will push the chance for a vote closer to Christmas.”

Asked if he were concerned that could further extend the lame-duck session until after Christmas, DeMint said: “So we all want to go home and be with our families. If they want to do it, let’s stay here until New Year’s eve.”

Fuck you, DeMint. Fuck you and your anti-Christian Christianity. We’re sure Jesus wold have done the same thing, force everyone to stay in one place and not go home to worship in His name!

Ya hear that, Kentucky? You’re building Noah’s Ark! You officially have the technological savvy of people who lived 7,000 years ago (or, more specifically, never lived).

So, hey, why’s everyone so excited? Again, from the governor of Kentucky’s actual press release:

One of the factors in getting the Ark Encounter to launch the Ark project at this time was a November 2009 CBS News survey, which revealed that the remains of Noah’s Ark would be the greatest archaeological discovery of our day. CBS News stated: “CBS’ 60 Minutes news program, in conjunction with Vanity Fair magazine, recently conducted a web survey asking which archaeological discovery people would most want to see made next. The response: Noah’s Ark (43 percent); Atlantis (18 percent); Amelia Earhart’s plane (16 percent); Nixon’s lost tapes (13 percent); and Cleopatra’s barge (5 percent).

In other words, this will be the most exciting tourist trap ever! More exciting than an Atlantis theme park featuring Amelia Earhart’s plane where the soundtrack is the missing Nixon tapes. Holy shit, Kentucky! You just blew our minds.

It’s all so stupid, the idea that God wants Floyd Mayweather to win more than his poor opponent or that he wants David Ortiz to get hits against the Yankees (possible). But why doesn’t the proverbial shoe ever go on the other foot? Why doesn’t anyone ever call out God when something terrible happens?

Enter Buffalo Bills wide receiver Steve Johnson:

Yep, he straight cold dropped a pass that would’ve given the lowly Bills a win over the vaunted Steelers. So what’s the natural response after a little time for reflection?

If you don’t love this, you just don’t love sports. Finally, someone to look up to.

Rep. John Shimkus (R-IL) — who claimed this week he is “uniquely qualified among a group of talented contenders to lead the Energy and Commerce Committee” — said that climate change should not concern us since God has already promised not to destroy the Earth,” the Toronto Star reports.

Said Shimkus: “The Earth will end only when God declares it’s time to be over. Man will not destroy this Earth. This Earth will not be destroyed by a Flood. I do believe that God’s word is infallible, unchanging, perfect.”

I’m being serious: is there any reason we can’t all agree on this?

UPDATE:

Now with video goodness!

(Political Wire)

On a side note, you’d think the teabaggers would have been more vocal when George W. Bush was spending huge sums on two wars, giving tax cuts to the rich, expanding a prescription drug program without paying for it and growing the federal government’s role in public education with middling results. But then again, he’s not black.

Interpol today warned its 188 member countries that there may be a higher threat of terrorism if a Florida fringe pastor burns Korans on Saturday as planned.

“One of INTERPOL’s primary functions is to prevent crime, and given that we have been made aware of a significant threat to public safety – an assessment which we share – it is our duty to ensure that we pass this information on to law enforcement agencies around the globe so that they can take appropriate measures,” Interpol Secretary General Ronald K. Noble said in a press release.

“Although there are currently no specific details as to what forms of terror attacks would follow, what is clear is if the Koran burning goes ahead as planned, there will be tragic consequences, ones which may well claim the lives of many innocent people,” he said.

Still, Jones says he’s pretty sure he’s gonna go ahead with the burning…unless the president calls him, because, you know, being told on TV by the president, alerted by the State Department and warned by a four-star general that what you’re doing is wrong, well that’s not enough.

Tell it to Terry Jones’s face or it doesn’t count, pussies!

We got so much of him at his fat person-only BBQ last weekend that we can hardly quench our thirst. Luckily, some wingnut has come up with a wonderful parody site that randomly generates horrific things Glenn Beck warned us about by using some of his favorite buzzwords. Hopefully this chalkboard app can get you through the day until your Mormon Jesus appears on the teevee to tell you what to be scared about.

[glennbeckwarned.us via Wonkette]

This whole debate over whether a community center featuring swimming pools, basketball courts and an auditorium should be built near Ground Zero is really bringing out the best in America, right? Newt Gingrich has likened Muslims to Nazis, GOP candidates as far away as Florida and California are using the local zoning issue as a race-baiting means of collecting votes, and hundreds of people who can’t tell a Muslim from a black guy wearing a do-rag are flocking to the old Burlington Coat Factory to protest.

Democracy! Ain’t it grand!

[h/t Gawker]